Whenever there are talks about emotions, mood & mental health - people tend to react distinctively.
Some show empathy while some show lack of interest. For some, it is just random gossip while for some it doesn’t matter to them. When we see such ignorant reactions of some people, we feel like why did they react that way. There might be reasons like either they feel scared or uncomfortable talking about it or don’t get it because they haven’t experienced it.
Whether it’s a youth from today’s generation or a kid from Gen - X or a grown-up person from our previous generation, everybody goes through different mood swings & has different emotional reactions to different situations.
How do they manage? Either they are used to it & they manage somehow of their own or let it burst out open in front of everyone or in between their closed ones or they just don’t let it come outside, keep bottling up inside & when it comes out it is either troublesome for them or people around them.
Working on mood & emotional state becomes important on a personal level because one should not let these control your mind & body. Not just personally, socially it is equally that important - be it with family or in any surroundings as people who would understand your emotions & mood might calm you down but people who don’t might react in a manner that would leave one hurt more. We sometimes ignore this thinking that, ‘Eventually we will grow up without working on ourselves.
The real challenge comes when you start sharing your time & space with a partner. The first thing we do as human beings in a relationship is express our love, also we share things that affect us or disturbs our mood or emotions. In a romantic situation, we accept all these things verbally. The real test comes when we experience that situation. Sometimes out of love we just accept the partner’s mood, sometimes we tend to ignore, sometimes it leaves the other one hurt while some react counter-impulsively to one's mood.
These grow eventually from the first stage of the relationship until the last stage where the couple either separate themselves for not being tolerant or a situation where one partner doesn’t change their mood & reaction while the other starts ignoring them just to keep everything calm. Many couples just get separated due to anger management issues, lack of patience, Ego that stop them to fix up which starts from silly mood reactions. Meanwhile, in other cases, a partner might ignore their partner’s mood & emotion, but they don’t realize that this is just declining love & trust in the relationship.
But there is another category of couples who not only went through the same phase of troubles, misunderstanding mood & emotions but they improved personally as an individual & also grew as a couple together. To make a relationship stronger & keep that love for a lifetime - having open-mindedness & acceptability towards each other’s emotions is very important because the partner is the first person where he/she can express their unfiltered emotions. The person who conveys their emotions just expects their partner to have a non-judgmental acceptance.
We tend to make many decisions in our life out of emotion no matter whether they turn out to be good or bad. But the emotional side with your partner in understanding them & making them understand will just lead to peace of mind and build trust between the couple. Sharing & understanding the emotions have brought couples closer but it starts with the presence of emotional intelligence. Not just one person, both the partners should be emotionally intelligent, then only they can face the challenging situations in life together. Challenging situations in life put us at test on how to respond to those situations as an individual & also as a couple.
But when you deal with these problems with emotional intelligence, not only you personally come out of that problem but also you often help your partner to come out of it & walk off from the situation as a winner.
Now as you found how emotional intelligence can impact relationships, here are some basic hacks you can practice personally & together as a couple to manage moods & emotions and maintain a healthy relationship
Talk - Having a good conversation is the easiest way to solve all the problems. Speak your heart out.
Be a good listener - When a partner speaks, the other must be a good listener. A major problem is not listening from the heart. A good listener always tries to understand the meaning & depth of the emotion-blended words he/she has been conveyed.
Stop reacting furiously or impulsively in silly situations which eventually leaves embarrassment & awkwardness post the situation.
Convey peacefully to the partner things that disturbed or bothered you or left you hurt. The other partner should listen peacefully. Once a partner is calm, you can correct them politely what was right or wrong.
Never shy from apologizing for your actions if they left your partner hurt or affected. You won’t lose any self-respect if you take the step to save the relationship from your wrong action.
Emotional Intelligence is the key to manage the mood swings & emotional state of a person individually & as a partner together. Sometimes we know the problem, we have the solution to the problem too but we are unable to work it out. For a situation like this, you can always refer to a counselor or a couple therapists. There is nothing to shy from discussing your problems because they are the experts who can identify the real reason behind the situation which is not letting things work out. Once this is fixed, life becomes a joyful ride with a partner by your side.
Do comment what all ways you can see value addition to your life and don’t forget to share it and follow me on Instagram & Facebook - @relivewithsangeeta & ReLive-Because You Matter
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