Our past experiences play a significant role in shaping Who We Are and What We Want. We all go through certain experiences that eventually help us to lead happier and healthier lives, but at the same time, we might also be adversely affected by the losses, negative hurtful experiences, abuses, and painful events. If you are not ready to let go of your past, then you'll be bound to struggle to focus on the present, eventually it will impact the future and you'll also miss out on the joy of living in the present moment. However, having said that letting go is easier said than done, and at times unconsciously you might find yourself continually pulled back to the past even and getting stuck even if you have a strong desire to move on & focus on the present.
Paulo Coelho once said, “Make peace with your past so it won’t destroy your present.” There are several things that most of us want to keep secret from ourselves and the people nearby, things that give us so much pain and misery.
Why It Is Important To Make Peace With Your Past?
Here are three of the most powerful reasons why it’s important to make peace with the past.
To create new things and form new connections, you need to create space in your present.
Past can’t be changed. You can only control how to deal with it. Acceptance is the key and keeps working on making your present better by self-improvement and self-growth and have faith in the future.
When you overcome the difficulties of the past, you become a more powerful, more proficient person.
Here are some outlines on HoW you can make peace with your past:
All of the following methods focus on how productively you can move on from the past to change and grow as a person. Simply denying or suppressing feelings won’t allow you to get closure. Instead, it just delays the process of moving on. You need to change this belief from Moving On to Moving Forward.
1. Express your pain or grief - Always try to express your feelings, even if it’s anger or pain. Keeping within yourself and Overthinking won’t help you to stay happy for a longer period. There are some techniques to express your emotions without hurting others. For example, you want to send someone a letter or a message and convey your feelings but your subconscious mind is not letting you do because of the fear to lose them, In that case, writing a journal or maintaining a diary can be helpful, or you can connect with Relive - Because you matter to get unstuck and gain clarity to start your life in a more Congruent way.
2. Forgive & Let Go - Firstly, accept that you are not perfect. You have to forgive yourself first for your peace of mind and then choose to forgive others. Don’t let your past experiences ruin your present. The decision you took in the past will never define your present, rather learning from the past decision will make you Stronger, Wiser, and a Better person. Next, forgive those who have hurted you in your past. Yes, forgiving is an art that never comes easily. You have to practice daily. Forgiving people will make you healthier, less anxious, improve your immune system, lower blood pressure, and most importantly will keep you happy.
The real motto of my life is ”Forgive and Forget”. It gives immense satisfaction when you start forgiving yourself and the people around you.
3. Focus on the Future - Another great idea you can practice to make peace with your past is to focus on the future. If you want to move on, though, you have to allow yourself to believe in the hope of a bright future.
When it comes to dealing with your past experiences, time can be your best friend. When you focus on the future, your past will seem like a faraway thought. Let time heal your pain. Time will make the memory fade and scars light.
Time waits for none. Bruce Lee has a significant quote, “If you love life, don’t waste time, for time is what life is made up of.” Therefore, work on your future. Focus on your life goal and move on. Choose to set new goals that will empower you and give you strength.
4. Accept The Present - Accepting who you are and letting go are two separate things. When you let go, you choose to never dwell on it and you move ahead. However, when you accept your past, you realize your mistakes and failures so that you can move forward. You may have been a sufferer in the past, but you are still here despite the hurdles that came across your life journey. This will make you a survivor, you may not sense it, but you are mightier than your problems and much more powerful than your challenges. When you deal with your past, you can prefer to be proud because you sustained, or you can choose to surrender to failure and never get ahead.
5. Count Your Blessings - Lastly, count your blessings. Feeling thankful is a very strong way to get rid of negativity and to make peace with your past. Always be glad for what you have managed to accomplish to this point. You may feel like you have not achieved much, but as a person who is browsing this right now, you are striving to change your life and make it great. It is an achievement. Practice gratitude by drafting a list of things that you appreciate. When you are feeling thankful, you will appreciate the things that you have, your parents, your friends, your house, your job, etc, above all you being alive and you will start feeling peaceful.
Thus, you must ascertain how to make peace with your past if you want to live a happy and fulfilling life. It is just like driving a car, if you want to go forward faster and farther, you must let go of the handbrakes. Most people drive with their hand brakes on, where their pasts are pulling and restricting them. You simply have to clear the hand brakes to go smoother and faster.
Remember this Life has a beautiful way to shift us from our comfort zone, and it keeps hitting us harder till the point we take the lesson in our life. And then we are unstoppable and unimpactful.
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